48th Birthday Celebration

Early this morning I called up my wife Marilene and she sang a birthday song and some other love songs for me. I went to work and my colleagues including the owner of the company greeted me Happy Birthday. When I came home I spent time viewing the greetings that family and friends sent me. I just finished having a long internet chat with my wife and I am so glad that she is there for me on this special day. Last year I can still recall that I celebrated my birthday in my hometown of Cabatuan, Iloilo, Philippines. I was still wearing a monk's cowl then and I was still in the ministerial priesthood. I celebrated Mass at the church with family, former teachers, classmates, relatives and friends. Then, a party was given at Huesca St. Then a month later I expressed my decision to leave priesthood and get married. The marriage took place in Manila last December 8,2007 and our wedding pictures got published in http://www.cabatuan.com/ Just recently my wife Marilene went home to Cabatuan for the Fiesta celebration last September 10,2008. She was very glad to make that trip and have a break from her busy office schedule in Manila. She stayed in my room in Huesca St. during her stay and she visited and came to know my family, relatives and friends there. As I celebrate my birthday today, I cannot help but pause for a moment and take a good look at my life, this gift of life that God has given me. All I could sum up saying is that God is love. Everything that had happened in my life, since I was born into this world is an expression of the love of God. St. Ignatius of Loyola in the First Week of the Spiritual Exercises highly wrote of the necessity to have this conviction and assurance of being loved by God unconditionally. In my growing up years and adult life I experienced the love of God in all aspects, especially in those very trying moments of powerlessness over areas of unmanageability and lostness of self wherein I found myself stucked in the morass of self pity, guilt, fear and anger. In the cry of Jesus on the cross, " My God, my God, why have you forsakened me? " I have found the meaning and purpose of all my pains and sufferings in life. The blessed Pope John Paul II wrote that in that very moment Jesus was expressing both the human and divine cry of anguish. In the human side, Jesus identified with the very totality of the pains of humanity and cried the same cry and asked the same question, " Why? " His human cry was also my very own at very significant and deep painful situations of my life, which is an experience of hopelessness and wasteland of abandonment. On the other hand, the divine cry for help is a sigh of surrender, of acceptance of pain as the touchstone of spiritual transformation, of the courage to let go and let God and of the willingness to die in order to live. Today as I celebrate my birthday, I am very aware and conscious that as I totally surrender to God in the divine order of things, I have chosen to die to my old self which is tired, exhausted and disgruntled and I have made a conscious and responsible decision to live my new life of freedom from the bondage of self, of victory over my human weaknesses and imperfections and of joy for having found my true vocation in life, to live as an ordinary and simple man, loving and caring for my wife and our family and fostering our spiritual growth together as husband and wife. Today I am spiritually awakened that the best way to celebrate one's gift of life is to go inside my own self and find my reason for living. In the book, Beginning to Pray, Archbishop Anthony Bloom, the author, was interviewed by Timothy Wilson. At one point Timothy Wilson asked him, " Your father sounds to have been an extraordinary man. Can you remember very much about him? " To this question, came his touching and thought provoking reply, " I remember a certain number of his phrases. In fact there are two things he said which impressed me and have stayed with me all my life. One is about life. I remember he said to me after a holiday, ' I worried about you ' and I said, ' Did you think I'd had an accident? ' He said, " That would have meant nothing, even if you had been killed. I thought you had lost your integrity. ' Then on another occasion he said to me, ' Always remember that whether you are alive or dead matters nothing. What matters is what you live for and what you are prepared to die for.' These things were the background of my early education and show the sense of life that I got from him. " Today as I think seriously about my life I can well say that when I got married to Marilene T. Lusaya last year I had my date with destiny in the face of a tired, exhausted and distraught world where men continue to fight and hate each other even in the name of religion, where most political leaders continue to be corrupt and religious institutions continue to lose their grip of being the conscience of the human condition of misery, injustice, sickness and death. Indeed, when I got out of priesthood and got married I simultaneously declared my freedom to seek the God of my own understanding and experience and know that still I am loved, blessed and provided with the grace and strength to move on and discover untapped vistas of my spiritual search for my true meaning and purpose in life. I have found my wife Marilene to be the very reason for me to live my life to the fullest, in joy and serenity with her as we trudge the road of life hand in hand and hearts forged into one towards the stars of our greater destiny as a couple God designed and meant us to be. To end, let me quote a classic Latin verse, " Omnia Vincit Amor " which means " Love conquers all ". I also thought of this today and for me when there is true love and devotion there is no difficulty that cannot be surpassed, there is no conflict that cannot be resolved, there is no dream that cannot be realized, there is no doubt that cannot be relinquished and there is no happiness that cannot be fulfilled. On my birthday today, I have found out and deeply felt that life is a celebration not just on the day of one's birth but that in each moment of each day life in all its wonder, beauty, grandeur, drama and giftedness can be truly relished, tasted and enjoyed together especially in married life.

Spiritual Responsibility in Marriage, Marriage Message 7

"Successful marriage is always a triangle: a man, a woman, and God" (Cecil Myers). Think about it -- is your marriage "successful"? Is God the important leader in your marital relationship? Even if your spouse isn't walking in spiritual obedience, have YOU invited God to be a leader in your relationship, even if He is the silent partner until your spouse spiritually wakes up? Think about it. This week we're focusing on the subject of spiritual responsibility in marriage. I (Steve) will address the husbands and Cindy will address the wives. So first off: HUSBANDS: Spiritually bathe your wives. I've been told many times that a HUGE concern expressed by women is that their husbands are contributing little, if anything, to the spiritual health of their marriage. They say things like, "He's a great husband but he doesn't give me what I need spiritually." There are two things I've come to understand about this subject (through my own struggles in this area): (1) One of the hardest things for husbands to remember when it comes to our bride is to do what Christ showed us by His example: "to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing of the water from the word" (Ephesians 5:26). For some reason many of us husbands neglect doing this. But each day is a new beginning so today could be good day to start. It's better late than never! (2) As we follow Christ's example and lovingly pray for our bride and wash her in the word of God, we strengthen our marital intimacy and bond more than almost anything else we can do for her. To wash our wives in the Word doesn't mean preaching to her. That can make her feel like a child if she doesn't appreciate this. But it's communicating the gospel with and without words. Even if your wife is hostile to your sharing the word of God with her, you can still pray a blessing silently over her and ask God to show you how to bond you closer together. For those of you who do have a wife who would enjoy this spiritual connection, we'd like to share with you some insights that Eddie recently wrote in one of the comment sections of the Marriage Missions web site (at www.marriagemissions.com). He wrote: "Probably the single most important thing that my wife of twenty-eight years and I have learned, is to pray for each other out loud every day. I am supposed to be her covering. I wouldn't want my wife going out into the world unclothed for every man to look at. If I don't cover her each and every day then spiritually, I'm sending her out exposed for the enemy to see. We pray out loud so that we can hear with our ears and get it into our minds that we are loved and cared for. Also, we know that the enemy doesn't know everything like our Father does, so we pray out loud so that he can hear. We do this even when we're angry with each other. It's amazing how hard it is to stay angry with someone when you hear them praying just for you and even harder to stay angry with someone while you're praying God's blessings on them for the day." That's great advice, isn't it? The following are some additional tips that you might find helpful as well in uniting you and your wife closertogether: 1. Find a devotional (maybe on marriage) that you can read together every night before you turn out the lights. A great one we recommend is "Devotions for a Sacred Marriage" by Gary Thomas. (We give a review of this devotional as well as others on the Marriage Missions web site). 2. Read scripture together. You can do this even a few verses or chapters at a time, and then share insights that come to mind. 3. When God teaches you or you learn something from His Word, be sure to share that with your wife. It may bless and enrich her life as well. 4. Ask your wife how you can be praying for her throughout the day while you're apart. 5. Start the day by praying together (and/or end the day this way -- whichever works out best). This has greatly enriched my marriage with my wife. I believe it will help yours as well. As we take spiritual responsibility in our marriages, we may find that other problem areas will begin to resolve themselves as well. And men: love your wife enough to resist the temptation to chastise your wife if she isn't doing what Cindy will share next. WIVES: You are not your husband's Holy Spirit. Yes, you are his partner and you may need to "speak the truth in love" to him at times. But sometimes we do too much horizontal talking and not enough vertical talking to the Lord over matters that bother us about our husbands. Sometimes our words can get in the way of what God intends to do if they are said when our husband's ears are not receptive to hearing what we have to say. It has taken me a lot of years of anguish to finally listen to the Lord over this matter. I've come to realize that it's not our responsibility as wives, to shame or accuse our husbands of not being spiritual enough (if we perceive they are lacking). We ARE told in the Bible in Galatians 6:1-5, "If someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, for each one should carry his own load." What I see from those scriptures is that we are to be GENTLE if we are to "restore him." But we're also warned to watch ourselves because we could be tempted to do what we shouldn't (like saying more than we should, or saying it in the wrong manner or timing, or pointing out the "speck" in his eye when we have a "log" in our own eye). We should be careful of our own spiritual walk so we aren't hypocritical in our interactions. "Do not merely listen to the word and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks in a mirror and after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like" (James 1:22-24). Don't allow the problems you see in your husband to distract you from living Christ. If you feel you have to nag or berate your husband to get him to "wake up" spiritually, beware! You're stepping into Holy Spirit territory. Be your husband's prayer partner and ask the Lord to show you how to love him as "unto the Lord." Know when to say something and when to be quiet. God will lead you as you draw close to Him and ask and receive. We pray that each of you will be sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit in carrying out your spiritual responsibilities. "If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and power for ever and ever. Amen" (1 Peter 4:11). Blessings,Steve and Cindy Wright P.S. If you think of others who may benefit from these weekly messages, please forward this to them and encourage them to subscribe to this FREE ministry. To subscribe, visit www.christianchallengeandblessing.com

The coming home of my wife Marilene to the Sagra Family

Today, the 7th of September my wife Marilene went to Janiuay, Iloilo, Philippines to visit my mother, Mrs. Lilia Parian Sagra and my brother, Dr. Calixto P. Sagra, MD and another brother, Carmelo P. Sagra and my uncle, Fr. Felipe A. Parian Jr. in our family home. It was a very warm, happy and loving get together as seen in the pictures my wife posted in our Friendster account: Bomarl1208. This is the very first time that my wife visited my family of origin since we were married and we thank God she has done it with grace, beauty and joy! Now we move on and keep waiting for the day when she will be getting her U.S. Visa to come and join me here in McCloud, California, USA.